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Dan McGrew
This is
a story of downfall and shame
The end in Alaska of a very proud name
The boys were all drinking and talking of ass
Of virgins and whores and rolls in the grass.
Of fairies and cocksmen and old moby dick
Who drove the girls crazy with a wart on his prick
Now over all this commotion
In the corner sparks flew
For there on the floor, on top of a whore,
Lay Dangerous Dan McGrew.
And out of the night as black as a bitch,
And into the din and the smoke,
Came shady old prick right up from the crick,
With a rusty old load in his poke.
He rolled out his cock to display to the flock
And every asshole squirmed
He drew from his belt a big bag of gold
And laid it down with a grin
He turned to the crowd and said in a loud voice:
"I've come to give Dangerous Dan a choice.
"This gold is for pleasure and I'm here to say
"I'll spend every nickel for one damned good lay
"So here's the deal straight and neat
"That girl you're on Dan or you in the seat"
A hush still as death came o'er that place
And the only smile seen was on the face
Of that old weezened stranger named Ace
The crowd sat and waited for Dan to get through
And the matter at hand between the two
"You'll not touch the girl while I'm still on hand."
Said the stranger, "Then it's your ass Dangerous Dan."
The crowd made clearing as the circle round
Each eyeing the other but neither gave ground
The lights went out, I ducked to the floor,
And the stranger sprang in the dark.
His aim was true
And the sparks they flew
When his donnicker found its mark.
Mid might and main and screams of pain
And a man's voice was heard in the room
There were sighs and moans and farts and groans,
And three bodies lay stacked in the gloom
Then a moan of delight mingled with pain
A scream, then a moan, again and again
The crowd was astounded as the lights were lit
And showed two men locked together all covered with shit
A figure arose from the two locked together
Staggered out of the bar and into the weather
With a satisfied look on his pan.
For there on the floor,
With his asshole tore,
Lay poor old Dangerous Dan.